They shall abundantly utter the memory of thy great goodness, and shall sing of thy righteousness. he Lord is gracious, and full of compassion; slow to anger, and of great mercy. The Lord is good to all: and his tender mercies are over all his works. Psalms 145:7-9
We know when we are not demonstrating the Christ-like character of gentleness; when we are sharp with someone because they rubbed us the wrong way, when something is not done the way we felt it should have been done. But in these things, we should always react in the manner of our Lord and Savior Jesus. Knowing that as believers, everyone is not at the same place we are, we should always move with mercy, grace and compassion,
And Jesus, when he came out, saw much people, and was moved with compassion toward them, because they were as sheep not having a shepherd: and he began to teach them many things. Mark 6:34
Gentleness is a distinctive trait for the Spirit of God; it is a main attribute of Jesus Christ, the Son of God, and today in all believers the Holy Spirit should be seen through gentleness.
In the Old Testament God spoke to Elijah and it is remarkable to note this scene as to where God spoke from:
"The LORD said, "Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the LORD, for the LORD is about to pass by." Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave. Then a voice said to him, "What are you doing here, Elijah?" I Kings 19:11-13
Let everyone see your gentleness.
Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand. Philippians 4:5
Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted. Galatians 6:1
Apostle Paul writes this to people who were probably spiritually stronger than the Corinthians were. He instructs the stronger ones within the congregation how to react to another who has not come quite up to their level of Christ-like behavior. Notice that Apostle Paul does not instruct us to fall on them like a ton of bricks:
Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ. (Galatians 6:2)
He says to restore them with "gentleness," considering our own state, and bear with them.
Notice carefully what Paul names as the reason for making unity and peace
I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you that ye walk worthy of the vocation wherewith ye are called, With all lowliness and meekness, with longsuffering, forbearing one another in love; Endeavouring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. (Ephesians 4:1-3)
There should be value we place on our calling. If, in our heart of hearts, we consider it of small value, our conduct, especially toward our brethren, will reveal it and it will work to produce contention and disunity. Thus John writes:
Apostle Paul next counsels us to choose to conduct ourselves humbly. Humility is pride's opposite. If pride only produces contention, it follows that humility will work to soothe, calm, heal, and unify. He advises us to cultivate gentleness; the opposite of the self-assertiveness that our contemporary culture promotes so strongly. Self-assertiveness is competitive determination to press one's will at all costs.
This approach may indeed "win" battles over other brethren, but it might be helpful to remember God's counsel:
"A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." Proverbs 15:1
James declares that godly wisdom is
"gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy". James 3:17
Apostle Paul counsels that we be patient; likewise, James counsels us to
"let patience have its perfect work". James 1:4
Offer the sacrifices of righteousness, and put your trust in the Lord. Psalm 4:5
The Bible provides many examples of godly people doing this:
Aaron ran through the camp of Israel with a smoking censer (a symbol of the prayers of the saints) following another of Israel's rebellions that greatly disturbed the peace between them and God. (Numbers 16:44-50)
In each case, God relented to some degree. We will probably never know in this life how much our prayers affect the course of division or how much others—even the wicked—gained as a result of our intercession, but we should find comfort knowing that we have done at least this much - our prayers combined with gentleness, mercy and compassion - toward making peace.