Of all the things that kill relationships, whether they are in the church or marriage or friendships, pride is the deadliest of all.
But he giveth more grace. Wherefore he saith, God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble. James 4:6
In the first letter to the Corinthians Paul deals with a church that is in turmoil for various reasons. The letter reveals the character of these people and a major reason why they have so many problems - pride!
Take a good look, friends, at who you were when you got called into this life. I don’t see many of “the brightest and the best” among you, not many influential, not many from high-society families. Isn’t it obvious that God deliberately chose men and women that the
culture overlooks and exploits and abuses, chose these “nobodies” to expose the
hollow pretensions of the “somebodies”? That makes it quite clear that none of
you can get by with blowing your own horn before God. Everything that we
have—right thinking and right living, a clean slate and a fresh start—comes
from God by way of Jesus Christ. That’s why we have the saying, “If you’re
going to blow a horn, blow a trumpet for God.” 1 Corinthians 1:26-31 (message)
One of the first things
Apostle Paul mentions about love's character is that "…love is never
boastful or proud."
Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity
vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, 1 Corinthians 13:4
We need to "Let Go of Our Our Ego" - which is something that is very difficult to do. Understanding the problems, knowing what should be done doesn't make it any easier. One thing is for sure, we all have ego and it's the most fragile as well as precious thing we possess so letting it go is difficult. By "letting go" I don't mean totally denying our sense of self - I mean letting go to the exaggerated sense of self that leads to egotism and destructive pride.
The Bible provides guidance
in helping us let go of egotism and sinful pride that causes so many problems
in our lives, especially in our relationships:
√ Accept Your Imperfections
We all understand the idea
that "nobody's perfect" but most of the time we operate under the
impression that we ought to be!
Get a realistic view of
yourself: "Don't think you are
better than you really are."
For I say, through the grace
given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more
highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath
dealt to every man the measure of faith. Roman 12:3
"Who can say, 'I have
kept my heart pure; I am clean and without sin?' Proverb 20:9
"All have sinned and
fallen short of the glory of God." Roman 3:23
These are not suggestions or
criticisms leveled at us - they are a divine confirmation regarding what God
knows to be true about us.
The Lord hath made all things for himself: yea, even the wicked for
the day of evil. Every one that is proud
in heart is an abomination to the Lord: though hand join in hand, he shall not
be unpunished. By mercy and truth
iniquity is purged: and by the fear of the Lord men depart from evil. Proverbs 16:4-6
God knows that
we are imperfect, He wants us to know that He knows. The problem is getting us to
accept it, not Him!
The first step in deflating
egotism is to recognize that there is no good reason for it. Recognizing that
there is no ground for our pride is the beginning of humility. Humility is not the absence of ego - humility
is the ability of recognizing the true value of one's ego.
A humble person isn't
without personality, he simply is one who has an accurate assessment of his
true strengths and weaknesses. The humble person is a realist when it comes to himself/herself.
√ Recognize God's Grace
For who maketh thee to differ from another? and what hast thou that thou didst not receive? now if thou didst receive it, why dost thou glory, as if thou hadst not received it? 1 Corinthians 4:7
(For who do you know that really knows you, knows your heart? And even if they did, is there anything they would discover in you that you could take credit for? Isn’t everything you have and everything you are sheer gifts from God? So what’s the point of all this comparing and competing?) 1 Corinthians 4:7 (message)
Most pride is based in self:
> My ego
> My feelings
> My needs
> My glory/reputation, etc.
If we are the center of our own universe, we are then the source of all good and bad in our lives.
The reason why pride is so treacherous is because
√ assuming that our power is making things happen;
√ taking responsibility for meting out justice when offended.
In reality all that
we have, all that we need is supplied by God's power and He does so because of
His grace.
God works from a basis of
grace. We work from a base of pride.
When we recognize that our
entire life is supported by God's mercy and grace several things happen: Our
world finds its correct order.
Ö We realize that God is God and we are the
created - we are freed from the trap and sin of idolatry.
Ö We tap into His power to provide for our needs
which relieves us of this burden. God hears the prayers of the humble. We begin
to serve God rather than self which produces joy and peace in our hearts rather
than anger and fear.
A proud heart is empty of
grace.
Recognizing God's grace enables us to remove self at the center of our lives
and place Christ in that position because He belongs there and we don't.
Another way of dealing with
pride is...
√ Experience God's
Unconditional Love
But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8
When the focus of our emotional energy is the love of self, the protection and nurturing of our own egos - we usually end up dissatisfied. We can never love self enough. Our love, even of self, is always limited by sin and based on performance (we love ourselves if we succeed, we hate ourselves when we fail).
The kind of love that feeds
pride creates a vicious cycle of highs and lows that never satisfies and leaves
one hungering for more.
Consider famous people
who never have enough attention and applause and who are continuously miserable
because the love and attention they seek is always conditioned on their
performance.
The way out of this cycle is
to experience the "unconditional and perfect" love of Christ.
This is a love
® freely offered because of God's goodness, not our own.
® dependent
on God's ability to love, not our performance.
® that
lasts as long as God gives it (which is forever), not as long as we deserve
it.
® that
is patient, kind, gentle, pure, faithful, controlled and generous - not subject
to moods, conditions and circumstances.
Our pride, our self-righteousness, our ego protection mechanisms melt in the face of this kind of love. When we offer this kind of unconditional love to ourselves and others, we will be free from the demands of pride in ourselves and avoid provoking the sins that accompany pride.
Pride goeth before
destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall. Proverbs 16:18
"God resists the proud and gives grace to
the humble." 1 Peter 5:5
There is ample warning in
both the Old and New Testament about the dangers of egotism and pride:
Lucifer, Nebuchadnezzar, Haman,
King Uzziah, and King Saul just to name a few.
Jesus addressed this fatal
flaw in a parables.
Two men went up into the temple to pray; the one a Pharisee, and
the other a publican. The Pharisee
stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as other
men are, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican. I fast twice in the week, I give tithes of
all that I possess. And the publican,
standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto heaven, but smote
upon his breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner. I tell you, this man went down to his house
justified rather than the other: for every one that exalteth himself shall be
abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted. Luke
18:10–14
According to Jesus, it was
the humble publican who went home justified.
You see, the Pharisee was proud of his good works, believing that his
spiritual deeds earned him standing and acceptance before God. But the publican
had simple trust in God’s mercy. The publican is forgiven, but the Pharisee
isn’t. We can’t miss that lesson if we want to grow in Christ.
Spiritual pride is deadly —The more spiritually proud we become, the more spiritually poor we are. Simply being poor is not a ticket into heaven, but rather only those who understand the nature of real poverty are blessed.
But those who recognize and admit their sorry spiritual state in life, who know they can be saved only by the grace of Christ, have an advantage in their humility. Jesus promises them,
Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Matthew 5:2
We can deal effectively with
these things in all of our lives if we remember to:
v Accept God's grace for our imperfections rather than masking them with pride and ego.
Once we acknowledge
our sins, it is such a great relief to depend on God's grace for our existence
and salvation than the impossible demands of ego.
v Accept God's love.
Egotism
is looking for love in the wrong way and in all the wrong places. God's
unconditional love gives us the freedom to love others and ourselves in a way
that promotes peace of mind and self-acceptance.
v Accept the fact that we are not perfect and that God is willing to deal with us this way.
If He who is perfect is willing to accept us as imperfect - we should be willing to accept ourselves and others with all imperfections as well.
Present yourself to God and to you and to
others in humility knowing that God gives grace and He will exalt you in the '5th
season'; that season that the bible refers to as DUE!
And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not. Galatians 6:9
(Sermonette)
02/22/22
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